How many times in a day do you worry about what friends, co-workers or even strangers think of you? It’s a normal reaction brought on by thousands of years of evolution when being accepted by the ‘tribe’ was a matter of life and death. Today the same emotional and behavioral response exists but the consequences are not nearly as serious.

Worrying about what other people think about us sucks. It’s draining and it makes us feel pretty shitty. Let’s imagine a best case scenario which is that everyone loves us and admires us (this is never going to happen btw). This may feel great but deep down we realize that our sense of self worth is in other peoples hands. They can make us feel good or bad about ourselves with a flip of a switch. See, even best case scenario sucks.

Worst case scenario is the way it probably already is in your life. Some people love ya, others don’t really and some are just neutral. That’s actually not that bad and let’s examine why. Anyone who has ever inspired me has had their balanced share of inspired followers and serious enemies. Let’s take a look at Jesus- pretty awesome guy in my books (if the accounts are accurate). But despite his meek and kind nature he seemed to rally up many enemies who wanted him out of the picture. I wonder how he was able to preserve his sense of self-worth despite all of this negative feedback.

What did Jesus have that allowed him to not internalize all of his enemies negativity?

The answer is: the same thing that you and I have too, a grounded sense of self-worth. We all have it but it’s like a muscle which takes practice and repeated use to get stronger. How can we strengthen our sense of self worth? Like anything else, by shifting our perspective of course! First remember this:

‘What other people think of you is none of your business.’ Paulo Coelho

Second, start taking your power back by not internalizing other people’s opinions. That includes praises too! They are just opinions that are really just projections based on other people’s reality. In no way will they ever define you, good or bad.

Thirdly, stop being so critical of yourself and others. It doesn’t make you a better person or help you strive for greatness; it holds you back and dims your light. There is no room for that kind of thinking in your life – our time here is way too short.

So go ahead, rock the boat and raise some eyebrows – all the great ones did. They also had the courage to leave the safety of their tribe to be who they really are.

Are you willing to stop worrying about what other people think of you?

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